Thursday, December 21, 2006

Seasons Greetings

Today is the official first day of winter and my last day of work before the holiday break. I will be at home tomorrow and throughout the weekend finishing up multiple projects on the house, so there will be no time for blogging.

Whether you celebrate Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanza or even Festivus, I hope that you enjoy your holiday and get to spend quality time with your loved ones. I leave you with the following politically correct statement and not-so-politically correct video of my favorite Christmas song.

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere, and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishes. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Kids are expensive!

We took Jake to the mall the other night to get some pictures done for Christmas. I mean, what kind of parents would we be if we didn't get some good pictures of baby's first Christmas, right?

So we went to Sears and the little man put on the charms when the camera started flashing. We got some really great shots then Jake decided that he'd had enough and wanted to nap. We sat down with our photographer and started looking at the "Holiday Special Packages". Three hundred bucks later, we have our keepsakes. And since I got the picture CD, I will share some of them with you.

But first, I need to tell you about the mall where Sears is located in Warwick. It is called the Rhode Island Mall, and it looks very similar to a ghost town. Other than Sears, Walmart and Kohls, there can't be 10 other stores in the whole place. It's empty store front after empty store front. And there are no people in this mall. Ever. The most you will see is when the DMV license renewal place is open during the day, and those people are not spending any money in the mall.

Why is the mall so empty? Because there is another mall located less than a mile down the street called the Warwick Mall, and all of the people and stores are there. Now I don't know which one was built first, but what genius looked at that area and said, "You know what this town needs? Another mall!"

I guess that they figure it works for Dunkin Donuts in New England, so why not a 200 store mall? I mean, you can't swing a dead cat without hitting a Dunkin Donuts up here. In Boston, at the Downtown Crossing MBTA station, there is one at street level next to the subway stairwell, and one at the bottom of the steps. Oh, and one on the other side of the tracks so no one has to walk up a flight of stairs to cross over and get some Munchkins. And get this, they're all busy!

But I digress.

Without further delay, here is the little man...

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Monday, December 11, 2006

Monday Funday

Being back to work today is actually a good thing for me. Between moving half of my belongings into the new house on Saturday and shopping with my wife and son yesterday, I really need a little break.

Today and pretty much all of this week, I am working about 90 minutes further away from home than I usually do. That means I leave the house at 4:30am. LEAVE at 4:30am! So much for my beauty rest.

I am overseeing a contractor that is installing a rubber roof onto one of our sites, and I'm getting a little buzz from smelling the adhesive that they are using.

Why are there rest room Nazis at gas stations all around where I am working today? In fact, why are there rest room Nazis at all? I just bought $60 worth of gas, a bottle of water, a newspaper, and a pack of gum at your store, but you won't let me take the Browns to the Superbowl inside? You direct me to the port-o-potty in the back that hasn't been cleaned since the Clinton administration? Damn you to hell!

I am already beaten down by Christmas music, and there are still two weeks left. If you see me in an elevator of a really tall building carrying something that looks like a guitar case, don't go outdoors until the shooting stops. Trust me on this one.

I am sitting in on yet another conference call. The topic? My boss's meetings in Atlanta later this week. I have no input into the agenda, and really have no questions regarding anything they are discussing. Needless to say, I have tuned them out completely and have seized an opportunity to update this blog.

The New York Jets are killing me. They had an opportunity to solidify their playoff chances yesterday and they lost to the suck-ass Buffalo Bills. I swear, being a Jets fan is like being the child of an alcoholic. Every once in a while, they straighten themselves up enough to give you hope that things will be different this time. You believe in them, even though they've burned you in the past, and you outwardly express your love for them. Then they show up drunk to a PTA meeting and make you feel like a jerk for thinking this time would be different. Yesterday's game was that PTA meeting.

That little buzz is starting to turn into a headache. I'm heading for the motrin bottle.

Monday, December 04, 2006

Closing Time

No, my blogs not going anywhere.

I am closing on my house in RI today. We'll start moving some things into the garage this week so we will have room to finish the basement in our current house this weekend. Hopefully, we'll actually get it on the market before Christmas. has been predicting snow here today for the past three days. It is sunny and about 40 degrees. I hate weathermen.

I am calling it now: The New York Jets will go to the Superbowl this year. Remember where you heard it.

I have decided that I am a much better carpenter than I am a mason. Laying tile sucks!

Can someone tell me why the doors on my F-150 occasionally lock as soon as I start the truck? It doesn't do it all the time, just once in a while. This tends to present a problem in winter when I like to warm it up for a few minutes while I drink my coffee in the house.

We have decided to go with laminate flooring in the new house rahter than hardwoods. I can install it faster, and my dogs and my kid can't destroy them. I think.

I really need a "guys night out" some time in the very near future. A few beers, some wings, and a game on a giant screen tv is sounding awfully good right now.

Speaking of giant screen tv's, I saw the new Sony Bravia yesterday, and WOW! It is the most incredible television I have ever seen. The picture was stunningly crisp and I am going to start saving some money to get one next year.

That is all I have. Discuss!

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